Aug. 19th, 2002

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Despite the torrents of rain this morning -- well, it felt like torrents while walking to work in it -- it's still too hot.

I feel like doing a rainy-weather-Sanzou and brooding. Alas, I have none of his customary diversions.

Oh well. I know the routine for days like this. Work. Cope. Get through it. Hope for thunder.


" ... But I saw on your mouth the twitch of your infernal sophistry; I knew that something was wrong with you and your cathedrals. Something is wrong; everything is wrong. You are not an angel. That is not a church. It is not the rightful king who has come home."
"That is unfortunate," said the other, in a quiet but hard voice, "because you are going to see his Majesty."
"No," said Evan, "I am going to jump over the side."
"Do you desire death?"
"No," said Evan, quite composedly, "I desire a miracle."
"From whom do you ask it? To whom do you appeal?" said his companion sternly. "You have betrayed the king, renounced the cross on the cathedral, and insulted an archangel."
"I appeal to God," said Evan, and sprang up and stood upon the edge of the swaying ship.
The being in the prow turned slowly round; he looked at Evan with eyes which were like two suns, and put his hand to his mouth just too late to hide an awful smile.
"And how do you know," he said, "how do you know that I am not God?"
Evan screamed. "Ah!" he cried. "Now I know who you really are. You are not God. You are not one of God's angels. But you were once."
(_The Ball and The Cross_, GK Chesterton)


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