letter drabble for flo_nelja - too much, too young

Title: Letter: too much, too young
Requester: flo_nelja
Series: Kuroshitsuji / Sherlock Holmes
Requested Characters: Ciel Phantomhive and Sherlock Holmes
Due to http://incandescens.livejournal.com/1022754.html

Mr Holmes,

I am a great admirer of your work, but must admit that I am troubled by a statement of yours.

As Doctor Watson has remarked, you have said: "When we have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth."

My question is: what does one do when the remaining truth is unthinkable, or unendurable, or simply cannot be true? Where does one go, when there is only the abyss to look into?

Is this why you take the cocaine, sir? Is this the real reason why you drug yourself with cocaine? Because I could very well understand it, if that is the case.

When you have eliminated the impossible, and whatever is left behind is unendurable, then where is there to go?

Yours faithfully,

Ciel, Lord Phantomhive

letter drabble for lady_ganesh -- someone's getting coal in his Christmas stocking

Title: Letter: someone's getting coal in his Christmas stocking
Requester: lady_ganesh
Series: Kuroshitsuji / Saiyuki
Requested Characters: Ciel, Hakkai
Due to http://incandescens.livejournal.com/1022754.html


My good sir,

I am somewhat surprised by the tone of your letter. You accuse me of a number of acts which I would certainly never commit, and in fact had to ask my butler for definitions of the same. Were it not for the dignity of my rank, surely my young age would make it unlikely (if not impossible) that I should be engaged in opium-running, theft of religious objects, and kidnapping of dragons.

I reiterate that I have absolutely no knowledge of the whereabouts of your pet, and can only suggest that someone of your own class is more likely to be guilty of such a crime.

I wish you the best of luck in your future journey, but must close now, as a local religious dignitary (called Genjou Sanzou or something similar) has just arrived, presumably to ask for Christmas donations.

Yours faithfully,

Ciel, Lord Phantomhive

sheer bloody stupidity

Right now, I feel a strong urge to horsewhip David Cameron on the steps of his club.

(Look, he's an old Etonian and a Conservative and a Prime Minister. He's got to have a club.)

Bloody idiot. And also idiots, all those idiots who are talking as if it's a good thing for us to have tried to play the flouncing diva and then veto-ed our way out of the EU.

Er. Excuse me. Pardon my temper tantrum. Okay, so we aren't out of the EU yet. But we're hardly doing anything to keep us in on the influence track. We are not some sort of huge world power or British Empire On Which The Sun Never Sets. We are a small set of islands off the edge of Europe, and right now, if the Euro goes down, everyone suffers.

(fumes some more)

Sorry. I know I don't usually talk politics. And it's not as if I liked Cameron and the Conservatives in any case. (I work in the NHS. Three guesses on my opinions about the current government.)

Anyhow. Weekend. Relaxation. Shopping. Cleaning. Stuff.

---

"... Had I known it was to trap my good friend Quill..."

"Friend?" jeered Senor Centime.

"My good friend," said Kurt firmly. "And I do not betray my friends. I may," he conceded, "sell them the shares unlucky, induce the wager on the horse belated, or pass them on the mine defunct. I will remove their pocket-books. I will effect the blackmail innocuous. I will, if it is absolutely necessary, drug them." He shrugged. "Les affaires sont les affaires."

"Sure," said Al. So far he followed perfectly.

"But the assassination -- never! Above everything," said Kurt proudly, "I am a man of honour."

-- Envoy on Excursion, Brahms & Simon